The Irish Times – Tuesday, July 6, 2010
FR ROBERT HOATSON
RITE & REASON: If clerical abuse victims are to recover, the Vatican must heed this five-point plan
THE POPE has apologised to victims of clergy sexual abuse in face-to-face meetings in Washington DC, Malta, and Australia, and in speeches in a number of places, including at a rally for priests recently in St Peter’s Square. While apologies are all well and good, the pope must now develop an action plan to meet the recovery needs of victims.
When my priest colleague Fr Ken Lasch and I realised in 2003 that little or nothing was being done to meet the diverse needs of victims of clergy sexual abuse, we embarked on the establishment of Road to Recovery, Inc.
It is a New Jersey-based charity that offers assistance of all sorts to help victims of clergy sexual abuse survive and recover. Road to Recovery helps victims pay their rents, mortgages, utility and other bills, and allocates funds for medicine, food and clothing, and a host of other needs that victims of clergy sexual abuse have.
Now that Pope Benedict has apologised profusely on a number of occasions, we at Road to Recovery would like him to consider the following five-point proposal that would go far in helping those who have survived clergy sexual abuse.
What is proposed below is an all-out assault on shame, guilt, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, low self-esteem, and all other effects of clergy sexual abuse. And Fr Ken and I offer our experience and expertise to the pope as he implements these steps, for we have worked with more than 1,000 victims and their families during the past seven years.
We propose that Pope Benedict and the Vatican:
1) Hold a media event at which Pope Benedict calls forth from silence and shame any and all victims of clergy sexual abuse with the blanket assurance that they will be taken care of;
2) Refer all victims to panels of independent lay Catholics and non-Catholics who can properly assess the damage to and needs of the survivors. In addition, victims’ family members will be assessed for damage as well – clergy sexual abuse affects entire families;
3) Establish in every diocese and/or region of the world Centres for Restorative Healing. These centres will be comprehensive in-patient and out-patient medical and social service facilities, meeting the needs of survivors in the areas of housing, medicine, psychological counselling, food and clothing, education, career counselling, and whatever else the victims need;
4) All facilities will be paid for by the Roman Catholic Church and will remain open and operational until every last victim is restored to health. Victims will never be turned away from or denied services for as long as they live;
5) Use the resources and experience of Road to Recovery of the US to advise the Vatican in the establishment of a comprehensive programme of healing for victims. Victims of clergy sexual abuse live in terror, turmoil, and torment every day of their lives.
In most cases their souls were murdered by men and women who represented God.
It is time the church placed these individuals and their families at the top of the list of priorities. No longer should a survivor have to worry about where his or her next meal will come from, how the household bills will be paid, how to fend off the latest panic or anxiety attack, or how to cope with nightmares and depression.
There will always be time for apologies but apologies are just words. The Vatican can demonstrate its apology by getting to work and giving victims what they need to heal.
The time for healing is now.
Fr Robert M Hoatson, PhD, is co-founder and president of Road to Recovery, Inc, a non-profit charity serving clergy abuse survivors. It is based in West Orange, New Jersey. He is at rmhoatson1@msn.com. The website is: road-to-recovery.org
I think the only way forward now is an organized hunger strike outside a prominent building in Dublin.
you can count me as first on the list.
500 suicides in ireland in 2009 god rest there tormented souls
thank you , it is good to know that you all truely understand and not just say you do .means a lot to me .im not functioning at present and ive been here many times before .
dead man walking ‘ dont do yourself any harm ‘ the less we are the more we lose ‘ we all know that it is impossable to make sence of all this . by keeping in touch with each on this site believe me you have your own value ‘ as we all read and care about what you say’. so be nice to yourself
dead man walking please take care your life is important to you and all of us too.
very concerned, thinking of you, i hope you get all the support you need and deserve.
very kind regards robert
im lost as to where that help is Ken .with the ammount of survivors that there are .there is not one central helpline number to direct survivors to the right help they need . the injustice and downright uncaring of it all that gets me . if a child of mine were to be put through what i have been put through in my childhood years . i would want those responsible , i would want there blood ! why is it i have to sit back and take what it is these people have legally got away with ? where do we take a stand on this the cruel reality of it all for all of us is we didnt get any real justice . we would have expected our countrys leaders would bring us justice (never have never will )
when my phase of wanting to die passes i get angry at the way we have been treated as adults relating to the obvious treatment meated out to us as children ( ryan report )and compounding everything im trying to get over
thanks ken im bearing up
Dead man walking,
your last post was a little frighting…
There is help out there for survivors…
hope you are ok?
I have been contacted this afternoon by Survivors in Manchester to say that a letter has been sent out to them by the part time outreach person stating that a meeting has been called in Manchester on Saturday 31st July 2010. The Chairperson and the Vice Chair of the Survivors Group had not been consulted and this meeting has been arranged over their heads,they in fact received a letter stating that this meeting had already been put in place.
Mary Murphy who is a Labour Councillor in Manchester is one of the guest speakers, who was voted down when she went for the Chairperson office at the last elections, Sally Mulready who is a big friend of Ms Murphy is another guest speaker and some others who’s names have not appeared in the letter are to speak.
This is the Irish Federation at their worst as their whole aim is to get Survivors to vote for this Statutory Trust Fund thus giving them getting plenty of cash from said fund to continue with their Irish projects for the Irish people in general and to secure wages for outreach workers etc
i can see why persons would take the law into there own hands …………….
2 many survivors are killing themselves while these people sit high and mighty looking down as we squirm ……..
there is no help for survivors !!!!!
many survivors including myself have been left with phycologicol problems
try getting help for that … turn up at A & E ..explain why you want to die and take a seat sir/madam
what a joke !!! and my patience is thin
watch this space
I made an error in my last post. I said we were going to get a fund, ooops, this morning I learned that the outreach groups and the survivor groups are lining up for handouts from the 110 million fund already. In one instance a group asked for a vote on the groups members “to have a stat. fund” they got seventy votes, they are asking for a show of more hands. So, I will assume that I personally will say goodbye to any notion of justice from the Irish Government or the religious orders. I thank my source of information for shedding some light on this outrageous skulduggery going on in Ireland and England. I cannot attend the meetings in Birmingham on August 14th as it takes me 11 hours flying from Canada, nor could I pay the 8 pound entrance fee (which this subsidised group,are asking for ?. There is something wrong with this picture.
Seanie.
A VIEW THAT I BELIEVE HAS BEEN OVERLOOKED BY ALL SURVIVORS THAT WE HAD TO ACTUALLY PAY FOR THE CRIMES AGAINST US BY THE STATE AND RELIGIOUS.
NO ONE COULD BE FOUND MORE GUILTY OF SUCH A HUGH CRIME AGAINST CHILDREN AS TO THEN HAVE SUFFERED AT THE VERY HANDS OF THE SAME SO MANY YEARS LATER.
IT IS SICK. THE ONLY TIME THE VICTIMS HAVE HAD TO PAY FOR THE MOST HORRID CRIMES COMMITTED AGAINST THEM.
SINCE WHEN HAS THE OFFENDER GOT THE RIGHT TO DICTATE HOW MUCH THEY SHOULD PAY THE VICTIM FOR THE CRIME THEY HAVE COMMITTED AGAINST THEM
ken i feel the same hopelessness even a government minister said the funds given are so very little.
this government had chosen all the people involved and paid the highest prices for legal teams and the such for the ryan report, murphy report, redress, and groups, this was their bill not ours, they chose these people not us and they paid them very handy indeed.
since they found out the truth was against them they actually charged survivors for the bill. disgusting attItude.
THEY WERE GUILTY AND THEY DECIDED TO GET THE VICTIM TO PAY THEIR COSTS FOR THEIR CRIME
THEY GRABBED ALL THE CASH BACK FROM THE RELIGIOUS, AND LEFT US WITH SCRAPS.
YOU KNOW THE USUAL TREATMENT. now they want us to shut-up and go away.
It makes me so angry…
I want to do something but what can i do?…
What can we do ??
Robert, I am still waiting for Fr. Hoawson to answer my questions, Im not holding my breath.
Dead man walking, I have been trying to get numbers from one of the Groups leaders on how many members he has, he said there were thousands in England, I again asked, how many do you have, I am still waiting to know that.
I want to know how this fund is going to be distributed as I am sure that is what we get, a fund, does anyone have a clue what they intend to do with it ?.
Seanie.
if the hse is funding these groups surely they give member numbers to them ? would freedom of information shed any light on this ? i was never a member of any group ! where are they getting there information on survivors ? if they have any info at all ? what is the criteria for groups getting funding ! and to the posters on here who have many times asked for survivor group leaders to explain there actions ! shame on you all ! you are scum to think you can mess with peoples lives ! ” for your own personal gain “
the vatican have set up new rules for abusive priests its an insult once again to survivors.
they have in the ryan report what they did, they seem to still deny the ryan report as they have not shown any remorse toward survivors and their families.
so they are cleaning up their policies to protect who?
children? survivors? the people? or their staff/priests nuns, bishops cardinals?.
i am sure it is the later.
nothing changes in a church that looks to wealth as their god and not health.
wealth does not exist without health because you are dead.
health is faith, hope and love
the actions of the vatican is doubt worry and fear for themselves.
the reason i blame the pope is because i do not think that god would have given instant absolution to the paedophile priests , nor do i think he would have sent them back to get on with it , would god have chosen the pope ,i hope not , the violence we lived in and having to watch the abuse on each other that was not doing good . i have always wondered where the good work of the church was , but god is another matter .
billy people have been calling on noel barry and christine buckley since the whole affair began for explanations and guess what? the same people were met with the same response do what you are told or else. they ruled the people because the people actually believed they were a legal organization employed to help survivors.
what a fecken set- up the whole thing was. these people giving advice to fellow survivors on what they setup with the government.
they destroyed any hope survivors had of a better life.
look at it this way if they were legally bound the survivors would have been much better off than they are now. not one barrister or lawyer has made a stand for all survivors to obtain a much better life than they have since their childhood. every child has dreams of becoming someone, just dreaming to survive the next day is all we have.
if every day is a life time how much of that day has been used up thinking if only.
these people now have fought very very hard for fundings why?
who payed for those big offices that were built and the apartments and so on survivors now who has to fund the running costs? well you can answer that one.
by the way does anyone know for sure that the right of place was also given land and property by the religious?
we need to know and proof they do not because they just cannot be trusted.
There is no one of importance listening to
our plea for justice and redress the more we
question our group leaders the more they hide,not one of them have the courage to
reply to this site.why!they have lived off
our suffering and abuse with their cosy cartels and cant account for the millions
they got from the HSE.
Surely the HSE must investigate these people,
(unless they are involved in the whole stinking affair)
I call on N C Barry and C Buckley to give us
answers.The government and the ministers don’t
give a toss about us the are delighted with
our so called leaders who will take the flak
for them.
Every survivor should resign from these groups
who claim to represent us if we all done that
they would have no one to represent,
maybe then the HSE will stop giving the parasites our money and put a end to the trust fund that the government are trying to
force on us
has anyone used the e-mail for mr hoatson above, just wondering?
most of these people are at or near retirment age, so does that mean the aisleen center and such , will be getting new bosses ,after all these years of goasts caring for us , it is beeing turned into a buisness , since the servises offerd to us are normally in the charge of the state and free for everyone else . we are and always have been a money spinner as x said in her interview . nothing hase changed not yet .
thats the reality of it now robert . as the saying goes we got played !
i must have been so stupid to even think of looking
dead man walking.
just the fact this minister referred me to the citizens advice who are not even aware of such a thing as survivors of abuse.
he must have had a laugh at my expense.
On the Citizens Information Search Page there are ALREADY links to pages covering:
Birth, Family and Relationships
Before your baby is born, Getting married…
Consumer Affairs
Consumer protection, Financial services…
Death and Bereavement
Before a death, After a death, The deceased’s estate…
Education and Training
Primary and post-primary education, Third-level education…
Employment
Starting work and changing job, Retirement…
Environment
Planning and development in Ireland, Waste management and recycling…
Government in Ireland
European government, Elections and referenda…
Health
Children’s health, Hospital services…
Housing
Renting a home, Owning a home…
Justice
Criminal law, Courts system, Children and young offenders…
Money and Tax
Tax, Personal finance…
Moving Country
Moving abroad, Moving to Ireland…
Social Welfare
Irish social welfare system, Social welfare payments…
Travel and Recreation
Motoring, Travel abroad…
Also on that page there is a link to the Titles Index where links to pages covering topics A-Z can be accessed.
So I don’t understand why a search for ‘Survivors of abuse’ would need to be made without narrowing down the Search:
Alcohol abuse, Drug abuse etc……
haha
Your search – survivors of abuse – did not match any documents.
it always was and always will be damage mimitation
that made me laugh robert
in fact the problems here are the fact that survivors all have different needs and they are all fighting for their needs to be met.
instead of put those needs down on paper so all can put the whole jigsaw puzzle together.
gathering people together is far more difficult than sending the problems we have as individuals to one place where we can have a complete picture of what we are dealing with.
all we need is an address of someone we can trust.
then that person can present the complaints to the right person. then if they fail to deal with the problems then we all can receive a time and place to meet up if we feel strongly about the out come.
remember there is no voice without action.
this way that person trusted would have statements on behalf of all unsatisfied survivors.
it is so very unhealthy to force survivors to go to these groups for support because all they are getting is bad memories and will never be able to move on with their lives. survivors are being forced to the place where it is so soul destroying.
they will never be able to move on as this web tightens its grip. it is wrong to force people into the same web they have been trying to break free from throughout their lives. this is not healing it is destruction of life itself.
these groups should be forced to sell the buildings they bought/paid for with survivors monies and work from home freely if they are telling the truth that they care.
other wise this is just another religious trap imprisoning people.
we should also have a legal representative office to make sure all paper work is legally taken care of and paid by the religious/government.
i have mentioned to a minister that if the funds are given to groups this is by force, by forcing people to always be connected to this industrialization of abuse. it is just not healthy at all.
on asking a on social welfare support for survivors of abuse
that if there is any understanding of problems that survivors are going through that may need extra support
i was reffered to the citizens advice web page by minister eamon cuiv department for social protection he suggested the citizens advice and the welfare web pages
here is what i found copied straight from the citizens advice as follows
Your search – survivors of abuse – did not match any documents.
Suggestions:
* Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
* Try different keywords.
* Try more general keywords.
* Try fewer keywords.
there is no understanding no care NOTHING this government is so far removed from what damage has actually been done to children in their care.
if this minister reffers me to the citizens advice and there is nothing no documents at all there is your answer get this government out now. they do not care nor do they respect children’s rights.
My time is long passed, I could call the Church and it’s priest;s as well as Nuns, Christian Brothers to explain why I flounder in my believes, I want to know God, I want to believe, I want to love all mankind, I hate no one any more. Our inheritance as children of an Irish society which buries its head in Catholicism that our parents, our poor ignorant parents, believed in.I do not blame my mother in believing that that her first born was evil by not attending school, Mrs. Morrison, your son is almost 13, he stole Father Lee’s bike and he has been mitching from school, begging through out the county, according to Guard White,have you no husband, Mrs Morrison,NO Sir, he took his hook to England, How many of us can relate to that scenario, there was no telegrams of the usual two pound ( circa 1940) delivered by the wire boy on his bike, at the door from the husbands in England. but that is all history now.Now we have the Church being bomb-blasted with all kinds of accusations, I and you are part of those accusations. These are not what I personally wanted to happen, we are victims of an evil section of our religion, I will tell you that I have not set foot inside the door of a Church since 1953, that’s sad, I am not proud to admit that, I do still believe in God and I pray. I read disheartening accusations of the Holy Father, his involvement in all the abuse of us, I find it hard to attach him to my own abuse, I cannot in my heart find that to be true even though I am not a Churchgoer any more. I respect the man who is the figurehead of God on earth and even though I have suffered at the hands of some of his disciples, I forgive them all.
Seanie.
The loyal servants of the vatican making these proposals within the Catholic Church, do not feel that a conflict of interest exists in proposing themselves as a healer in which their organisation continues to act as the organiser of histories greatest cult of child abuse and pedophilia.
The totality of their loyalty leaves them with highly unrealistic views which in turn fuels the organisations existence regardless of outcome for survivors. One wonders what the psychological qualifications of a priest could be and how they can exist in the modern era of reason and knowledge. Will nobody tell them that it has all been a ghastly hoax? Well, even if somebody does tell them, can they let it in to their minds?
Perhaps a few could absorb the truth but most will not as indoctrination has been such a success and the bunker in Rome and its bankers continue to function to their advantage. There is no need to let it in.
Social pressure is not enough, their purse strings and bread baskets have not been cut and that is when the true test of loyalty will exist.
IN the meantime, these true believers will continue to believe just enough to ensure their continued existence as they know it and are forced to need it. Charitable stage managed projects and the hokus pokus of religious propoganda will continue.
Its coming time to put the skids under them.
Noting will change in the Vatican. It is a monopoly. Unless something big, like an international lawsuit, dismantles this abusive empire.
Why victims believe that the Vatican really cares? Victims are no more than collateral damage. If you all doubt my words, just look at the 2000 year old history of Catholicism.
Sieglinde
Who does this priest think he is? Ratzinger has held many media events but the event I want to see is him and his cohorts – all those cardinals and bishops who facilitated the rape of children – in handcuffs on their way to jail. That would be the single most important event that would go to healing abuse victims.
every time the pope is filmed after these tours , itseems that he goes home as a hero , thats enough of that , thay even clap him , its another turn around , he was not raped , imprisoned, over worked ,in the years he kept quiet about things by his dicisionchildren were being raped beaten and starved , this has been known for years , in the rest of europe these schools had been closed in the 19th century ,only the irish government excepted and the big question is why , what wasin it for them